Refs Aid Buffalo Bulls*&t By Coddling Sabres

Meat Is Murder, Persistent Vegetative State Divine

Singer Morrissey has waded into the controversy over the new Oxford animal research laboratory by warning those working on the site “we’ll get you“. The singer used a concert at the city’s New Theatre on Thursday night to hit out at the £20 million biomedical research laboratory site currently under construction in South Parks Road. He branded Oxford “the shame of England” for allowing the laboratory and told fans: “If you agree with vivisection, go and be vivisected upon yourself.”

There were times when I could
Have strangled her
(but you know, I would hate
Anything to happen to her)
Would you please
Let me see her !
from 'Girlfriend in a Coma'

Senator 'Pat Geary' Reid Took Free Boxing Tickets

"Maybe I'll take one of those redheaded Yolandas!"

Con mucho gusto, indeed, Senator.

Train Like The Astronauts!

Desmond Dekker, RIP

Del Shannon, Quiff City

"Spider, Spider...What am I, A Mirage?!"

Winklepickers and A Packet of Crisps

Jimmy Hoffa?

"Billy Flynn. Third-degree burns all over his body. He can't stop smoking. His cigarette, fumes, some friggin' thing. Vaboom. There he goes. The priest, who was Father Doyle down at St. Margaret's, which you wouldn't know, asked him to confess. I'm coming to the end of it. As he is dying, Bill Flynn looks the priest in the eye...."

Susan Sarandon Something Something

NEW YORK -- Actress Susan Sarandon, a longtime liberal political activist and outspoken opponent of the Iraq war, endorsed an anti-war Democrat challenging Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton's re-election bid Tuesday. Sarandon is backing Jonathan Tasini, a labor advocate and former president of the National Writers' Union, who has based his longshot campaign on Clinton's vote in 2002 authorizing military intervention in Iraq.

'Sir Ian' Exposes Templar Heresy Rampant! Westminster Not Amused

"Well, I've often thought the Bible should have a disclaimer in the front saying this is fiction. I mean, walking on water, it takes an act of faith. And I have faith in this movie. Not that it's true, not that it's factual, but that it's a jolly good story. And I think audiences are clever enough and bright enough to separate out fact and fiction, and discuss the thing after they've seen it."--Ian Mackellen, O.B.E

"And during a production of The Scottish Play--at a ribald cast party--Johnny Gielgud bit me right here after roaring 'Something Wicked This Way Comes' and passing out with about a pint of amyl nitrate in his fist!"

Did Fascist Albinos Crucify Our Lord? For Shame, Tom Hanks!

East Hampstead, NH January 6, 2005 -- The National Organization for Albinism and Hypopigmentation (NOAH) celebrates 2004 as the first year in more than two decades that a major motion picture did not include an albino villain. But the organization looks ahead with concern to 2005 as director Ron Howard and Imagine Entertainment begin work on the movie version of the best-selling fictional novel 'The Da Vinci Code.'

"Ron Howard and Imagine can make a big difference for people with albinism by continuing the trend away from a hack device if they adjust the Silas character to not be an evil albino" said Mike McGowan, NOAH president. "Over the years the stereotyping and misinformation foisted on the albinism community by filmmakers who don't take the time to learn the facts about albinism does real harm to real people."

Title Link: DaVinci Author Behind NSA 'Conspiracy' From His Own Website. What Ron Howard Doesn't Want You To Know

Bill the Ted's Excellent Adventure

Enfin, J'arrive

It may have been Camelot for Jack and Jacqueline
But on the Che Guevara highway filling up with gasoline
Fidel Castro's brother spies a rich lady who's crying
Over luxury's disappointment
So he walks over and he's trying
To sympathise with her but he thinks that he should warn her
That the Third World is just around the corner

In the Soviet Union a scientist is blinded
By the resumption of nuclear testing and he is reminded
That Dr Robert Oppenheimer's optimism fell
At the first hurdle

In the Cheese Pavilion and the only noise I hear
Is the sound of someone stacking chairs
And mopping up spilt beer
And someone asking questions and basking in the light
Of the fifteen fame filled minutes of the fanzine writer

Mixing Pop and Politics he asks me what the use is
I offer him embarrassment and my usual excuses
While looking down the corridor
Out to where the van is waiting
I'm looking for the Great Leap Forwards

Jumble sales are organised and pamphlets have been posted
Even after closing time there's still parties to be hosted
You can be active with the activists
Or sleep in with the sleepers
While you're waiting for the Great Leap Forwards

One leap forward, two leaps back
Will politics get me the sack?

here comes the future and you can't run from it
If you've got a blacklist I want to be on it

It's a mighty long way down rock 'n roll
From Top of the Pops to drawing the dole

If no one out there understands
Start your own revolution and cut out the middleman

In a perfect world we'd all sing in tune
But this is reality so give me some room

So join the struggle while you may
The Revolution is just a T-shirt away
Waiting for the Great Leap Forwards...
BB

From The Good People Who Brought You 'HAL'

CHAMPAIGN, Ill., May 15 (UPI) -- U.S. President George Bush has waged a verbal "operation of deception" that shows an impressive use of language, two University of Illinois authors say. Far from being verbally challenged, so-called "Bush speak" has used deceptions and policies that are "a massive campaign to change the ways Americans think about democracy, globalization and empire," wrote authors Stephen Hartnett and Laura Ann Stengrim.

"Read my lips, Dave: these people get PAID to write this stuff?"

Floyd Patterson, Ave Atque Vale

So a rabbi, a priest, and Floyd Patterson walk into a bar...

"The Pilgrim, Chapter 11"

Eddie C. Straight Outta Compton

The Louisville Hip

But Steadman was already in the press box when I got there, a bearded young Englishman wearing a tweed coat and RAF sunglasses. There was nothing particularly odd about him. No facial veins or clumps of bristly warts. I told him about the motel woman's description and he seemed puzzled. "Don't let it bother you," I said. "Just keep in mind for the next few days that we're in Louisville, Kentucky. Not London. Not even New York. This is a weird place. You're lucky that mental defective at the motel didn't jerk a pistol out of the cash register and blow a big hole in you." I laughed, but he looked worried.

"Just pretend you're visiting a huge outdoor loony bin," I said. "If the inmates get out of control we'll soak them down with Mace." I showed him the can of "Chemical Billy," resisting the urge to fire it across the room at a rat-faced man typing diligently in the Associated Press section. We were standing at the bar, sipping the management's Scotch and congratulating each other on our sudden, unexplained luck in picking up two sets of fine press credentials. The lady at the desk had been very friendly to him, he said. "I just told her my name and she gave me the whole works."--HST

"Rumble Young Man, Rumble! AHHHH!"

"Start Your own Revolution And Cut Out the Middleman/Waiting For the Great Leap Forwards"--Billy B.

"The New Orthodoxies"

On her deathbed Gertrude Stein supposed to have asked: 'What is the answer?' After this she lay silent for some minutes. Then suddenly, raising herself up in bed, she asked: 'What is the question?' Then she died.

If this story be true, Miss Stein, on her deathbed, epitomized in these two questions the literary and aesthetic movement which began in the 1850's with Baudelaire noting that modern civilization created nothing to justify the continuation of life. Baudelaire, entering the universe of the Divine Comedy through the gateway of his own damnation, attempted to find his own answer to nineteenth-century materialism. But today we find the satanism absurd and the flowers of evil faded.

Even his insistence on being the poet pursued by furies, the albatross mocked by the hearties, is meretricious. Yet these histrionics do not challenge his position as the great primal modern poet. Why? The reason lies not in the answer but in a question: 'How can modern man, with his fallen nature, his classic past, and his role in eternity, live a significant spiritual life within the materialism of modern civilization?'

The reason why we can respect the satanism, the albatross, and the yearning for damnation is because they all serve to restate the problem--to pose the question. They remind us over and over again that man has to translate the life of his soul into the language of the modern city.--Stephen Spender

Rugby Chapel

"And there are some, whom a thirst
Ardent, unquenchable, fires,
Not with the crowd to be spent,
Not without aim to go round
In an eddy of purposeless dust,
Effort unmeaning and vain.
Ah yes! some of us strive
Not without action to die
Fruitless, but something to snatch
From dull oblivion, nor all
Glut the devouring grave!
We, we have chosen our path—
Path to a clear-purposed goal,
Path of advance!—but it leads
A long, steep journey, through sunk
Gorges, o’er mountains in snow.
Cheerful, with friends, we set forth—
Then on the height, comes the storm.
Thunder crashes from rock
To rock, the cataracts reply,
Lightnings dazzle our eyes.
Roaring torrents have breach’d
The track, the stream-bed descends
In the place where the wayfarer once
Planted his footstep—the spray
Boils o’er its borders! aloft
The unseen snow-beds dislodge
Their hanging ruin; alas,
Havoc is made in our train!
Friends who set forth at our side,
Falter, are lost in the storm.
We, we only are left!
With frowning foreheads, with lips
Sternly compress’d, we strain on,
On—and at nightfall at last
Come to the end of our way,
To the lonely inn ’mid the rocks;
Where the gaunt and taciturn host
Stands on the threshold, the wind
Shaking his thin white hairs—
Holds his lantern to scan
Our storm-beat figures, and asks:
Whom in our party we bring?
Whom we have left in the snow?"

Title leads to link

At Last

Eartha Kitt Remembers Lady Bird

"But Johnny, What will Hajji Say?"

Ypres Remembered on BBC

For all we have and are,
For all our children’s fate,
Stand up and meet the war.
The Hun is at the gate!
Our world has passed away
In wantonness o’erthrown.
There is nothing left to-day
But steel and fire and stone.